Grandma

I was thinking of Grandma today. She died back in Feb of 2001. I think she had quite a hard life, being a city girl who married a city boy who was promptly sent to work in the country. I remember her having lots of things. Lots. Stuff. Trinkets. Ornaments. Junk! When she died my mother and uncle and aunt had to clear out her little retirement village home (Papa had died in 1987), and my mother complained bitterly about all the stuff that had been squished into that tiny house: paper serviettes and sugar packets from McDonald's, tea towels, serving plates.... never-ending stuff.

But today I was thinking of Grandma and minimalism; something most people who knew her would say she didn't do! But I remember her telling me that when she was a young mother in the country she had precisely three dresses: two to be worn alternately through the week, and a "best" dress for Sunday. As the "best" Sunday dress became worn, it would be relegated to "ordinary" status and one of the "ordinary" dresses would become a dress for my mother, or rags, or something.

It's hard to imagine. But I really think I need way less clothing than I currently own.

(Photo of Grandma - Dorothy - aged 6, with her mother Vida. Christmas 1918.)

*Sigh*

Well, I haven't been a very regular poster recently. I guess deciding to study part time (distance ed, while working full time) is a big part of it. I am enjoying it - Master of Information Studies at Charles Sturt University - but it is time consuming and a bit stressful. I'm taking two subjects over the Summer and I'll be finished by Jan 31.  Yay!

But it has resulted in me doing a headless chicken act - work, run home, eat, study, sleep, repeat ad nauseam. Weekends are basic laundry and cleaning/shopping days, so anything other than the basics has fallen by the wayside and is piling up - cupboards need decluttering and organising, my desk needs setting up properly (yup, two semesters gone and I still haven't got the desk ready!), "stuff" has been accumulating all over.

One thing I do need to work on is not wasting time on the internet - if I've finished using it for study, emails, etc, then turn the damned thing off!! No endless wandering around looking at fun blogs and Facebook. Ack.

What do I need? Discipline? Whatever it is, I don't think I've found it yet.

(from http://softypapa.wordpress.com/)

Distant

It's been months since I posted here, and it's been a hectic few months. Summer (which I hate), trying to be there for my sister and her son, a new teaching year, busyness at work, two conferences, one overseas, the paper from which I spent hours reworking into an article which was (finally!) accepted for publication.... Argh. I need to rediscover peace and calm. Second semester starts next week. Am going to find the on-campus meditation group and join them.

(edited to add: the "on-campus" meditation group actually meets waaaaaay off campus, which makes it impossible to get there and back and actually meditate during lunch. Curses!)

Mindfulness

One of my goals this year is to work on mindfulness.... well, how do I do that? This great post from Zen Habits is useful:

from www.zenhabits.net

I've linked to Leo Babauta's http://mnmlist.com/ before, and this post and list of ways to develop mindfulness are in his inimitable style. I particularly like this one:

4. Put space between things. Related to the “Do less” rule, but it’s a way of managing your schedule so that you always have time to complete each task. Don’t schedule things close together — instead, leave room between things on your schedule. That gives you a more relaxed schedule, and leaves space in case one task takes longer than you planned.

It reminds me of Amy Dacyczyn's Tightwad Gazette story about only buying her children ice cream occasionally - that way it makes the "going out for ice cream" event special, and more meaningful. She likens it to the mat between a picture and the frame. Placing space between events/objects/etc allows them to be so much more interesting and different from everyday life, and therefore more appreciated.

Sunny recently posted about saving money - but I read mindfulness into her post, too. When you are mindful of where your resources go, you can expend them in whichever ways are most meaningful to you. Sunny mentions forgoing the daily bought-on-autopilot coffee, and putting that money towards a future hot air balloon ride.

Small considerations such as ice cream, coffee, and creating space in your life around events helps to value each one more. Not sweating the small stuff, but making the most of it, and appreciating it all.

And I can't mention food without remembering this Basho poem:

Oh bush warblers!
Now you've shit all over my
rice cake on the porch

--Matsuo Basho

鶯や餅に糞する縁の先　（uguisu ya / mochi ni funsuru / en no saki）

Newness

A new year, and a fresh start. Resolutions? The usual - eat better, get more exercise, work harder, blah blah blah....

Mostly I want to work on being mindful (Spud!) and concentrate on peace and honesty. True to myself, taking pleasure in small things, taking small steps forward on my spiritual journey.

A new year poem from Matsuo Basho (1644-1694)

The years first day
thoughts and loneliness;
the autumn dusk is here.

Here's to a year of simplicity, solitude and contemplation. All while living a real life in the real world!

Over

Farewell Chris, it was a long battle and now you can rest in peace. Namu amida butsu.

Lifecycle

Another long absence from the blog. The Mountain Hut has been drenched in tears as I prepare to say farewell to my brother in law, who is dying of cancer. He's off to a better place, whatever his destination. I feel so sad for my sister and their son, who is only 6. I know how I'd like to feel, and deal with this: serene, understanding, and compassionate. However I'm a red-and-swollen-eyed mess, who hasn't eaten properly in weeks and gets headaches and stomach aches from the stress. Acceptance is hard to find. It's all so unfair.

(edited: ok, "whingeing" is a little harsh. I'll add "sad")